Northerners visiting the South Information for Northerners Visiting the Southern StatesIf you are from the northern states and planning on visiting or moving to the south, there are a few things you should know that will help you adapt to the difference in life styles:1. If you run your car into a ditch, don't panic. Four men in a four-wheel-drive pickup truck with a 12-pack of beer and a towchain will be along shortly. Don't try to help them, just stay out of their way. This is what they live for.2. Don't be surprised to find movie rentals and bait in the same store. Do not buy food at this store.3. Remember: "Y'all" is singular, "All y'all" is plural, and "All y'alls'" is plural possessive.4. Get used to hearing "You ain't from around here, are ya?"5. You may hear a Southerner say "Oughta!" to a dog or child. This is short for "Y'all oughta not do that!" and is the equivalent of saying "No!"6. Don't be worried about not understanding what people are saying; they can't understand you, either.7. The first Southern expression to creep into a transplanted Northerner's vocabulary is the adjective "big ol'," as in "big ol' truck " or "big ol' boy." Most Northerners begin their new Southern-influenced dialect this way. All of them are in denial about it.8. The proper pronunciation you learned in school is no longer proper.9. Be advised that "He needed killin'" is a valid defense here.10. If you hear a Southerner exclaim "Hey, y'all, watch this," stay out of the way. These are likely to be the last words he'll ever say.11. If there is the prediction of the slightest chance of even the smallest accumulation of snow, your presence is required at the local grocery store. It doesn't matter whether you need anything or not. You just have to go there.12. When you come upon a person driving 15 mph down the middle of the road, remember that most folks here learn to drive on a John Deere, and that this is the proper speed and position for that vehicle
More jokes
Phrases For Everyday Life..
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.Insanity is my only means of relaxat..
Full joke here
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.Insanity is my only means of relaxat..
Full joke here
George W. Bush walks into a restaur..
George W. Bush walks into a restaurant in Washington DC with his wife Laura. The wait..
Full joke here
George W. Bush walks into a restaurant in Washington DC with his wife Laura. The wait..
Full joke here
If AOL Were A City.....
You'd live in a place where no two people had the same name. You'd only pay $21.95 a ..
Full joke here
You'd live in a place where no two people had the same name. You'd only pay $21.95 a ..
Full joke here
What did Michael Jackson say when h..
Q: What did Michael Jackson say when his cock slid in the little boys arse?A: There..
Full joke here
Q: What did Michael Jackson say when his cock slid in the little boys arse?A: There..
Full joke here
Two men were walking through the wo..
Two men were walking through the woods when a large bearwalked out into the clearing ..
Full joke here
Two men were walking through the woods when a large bearwalked out into the clearing ..
Full joke here