While your child is on his lap, he tells them they're not getting his Bud Light. You see his sleigh pulled over and the police with a breathlyzer. Those darn milk and cookies never worked but the Jack Daniels does! You don't remember getting a request for venison in your stocking. Betty Ford releases him on December 24th. After each child, he has a Jello Shot. This year the sleigh is being pulled by the Schlitz Malt Liquor Bull. He jumps down a manhole and then gets angry when he can't find the tree. Instead of going Onward, Dancer and Prancer...he just grumbles and says "Awww...just get going!"
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