Jeff Foxworthy in the Middle ages
You know you're Castle Trash if......Your shroud of Turin is painted on velvetYour daughter's chastity belt has rustedYou can't afford a cod piece................nobody noticesYou have more sheep dogs than sheepYou sold your only horse to buy that jousting lance you just had to have...The plague improved your complexion...........but only for a little whileThe Pope sends you to the Crusades...........in NorwayYour armor is made from that foil that came with your chewing gumYour wife is stronger than your plow horse...but the horse is prettierThe grail you brought home has "made in China" printed on the bottomYour wife says you have the smallest turret in the kingdomYou won "most improved " at the tournamentThey call your daughter made MarianYour family crest is a chicken with a banner that says "peace before discomfort"Your sheep seem strangely nervous around your oldest son
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